Perfection

Mama Kat’s Pretty Much World Famous Writer’s Workshop

The Prompts:

1.) List of lies you consistently tell.
2.) Tell about a time an adult caught you doing something wrong.
3.) An invention you’d like to see created.
4.) What have you been too busy to pay attention to?
5.) The perfect Mother’s Day consists of…

 Lies I tell……I have no desire to share what I lie about as then my cover would be blown

A time an adult caught me doing something wrong….all that comes to mind is the time my mother found a pack of cigarettes in my bag my Senior Year in High School….I’m sure there were other things but I    was one of seven kids…someone was always doing something wrong and getting caught and frankly, I can never remember who did what.

An invention…I’m not creative enough to even come up with an invention…I’d say something stupid like Oh, I wish someone would invent a vacuum cleaner that just goes all by itself…and Sean will say honey, there already is one…and I’d say What, when? How come I don’t have one? And then he’d say like 5 years ago and because you hate technology….and you’re cheap…and I’d be all like no I’m not….so what if I am….

What have I been too busy to pay attention to? Oh I could be all self indulgent and say me…or I could list the laundry, the filing at home, the upstairs closet, going through and getting rid of Lucy’s baby clothes/toys, the attic, the closet in the basement…..but really, what fun is it pointing out to myself all the stuff I have yet to get done….

That leaves me with the perfect Mother’s Day….

The perfect Mother’s Day consists of…………………..

Breakfast in bed….messy....that would be so messy…..which would result in laundry, which I’ll have to do tomorrow

Breakfast at my favorite diner in Cambridge….yes, Republicans go to Cambridge…but only for the food and we try not to look anyone directly in the eye

A massage….I’m not really good at people touching me…plus it means I’d have to shave….

A mani and pedi….once upon a time, this is a true story, I used to get manis and pedis every week…I have not had one in 5 years (wedding) and it had been 5 years prior to that (brother’s wedding) since my last one

Having my hair colored….I started going gray in my late 20s….I started coloring my hair in my 30s…I stopped when I got pregnant (for no other reason than my hair was growing so fast it became a waste of money)….and just never did it again…so I could have my hair colored…or just continue wearing it up and letting Sean Photoshop all pictures taken of me

A makeover…probably not, I don’t wear make up

Sleeping in….and by that I mean an uninterrupted sleep in…not the one when you are woken up at 5:00am and then are told at 7, you go back to sleep, I got her….I mean let me fall asleep when I go to bed and let me wake up when my eyes open of their own free will

A bag of plain M&Ms, Kettle Korn,  a stack of movies and the TV to myself….a little slice of heaven on earth…this is a possibility

Hang the hammock in the tree, give me that bag of M&Ms, Kettle Korn, TV on the deck for the Sox game and my iPad….and then leave me alone for the day…I could be on to something

All those are possibilities….Sean would, in a heartbeat, do any one of those things for me if I really wanted him to (really, I just want the M&Ms and the Kettle Korn)

But you know what I would really like for Mother’s Day?

What I really really really think would make it a perfect Mother’s Day?

If someone would come clean my car…..and I just sit on the front stoop with my coffee watching and relaxing (read supervising and pointing out the spots that were missed)

 I want someone to vacuum my car, wipe all surfaces, retrieve all fruit snacks, pretzel sticks, crackers, lollipop sticks and trash from whatever crevices they have worked themselves into.

I would like someone to wipe the cup holders clean of the coffee stains and melted fruit snacks residue.

I would like the inside and outside of the windows washed clean of Lucy’s handprints and saliva as she occasionally licks the window (no, now would not be a good time to ask why or explain why).

And if the seats and floors could be washed/shampooed, that would just be a little added bonus

And after my car is clean, you know what would top off my day?

What would make it a perfect Mother’s Day?

If someone would then go into the house and wipe clean all the baseboards (and by that I mean move all the furniture to the center of the room and then wipe down all the baseboards in all the rooms in the whole house)

And then if they could run the duster along the perimeter of all the rooms in the whole house, that would be great too.

And if they could clean the ceiling fans, well, I’d be ever so grateful….

And if they wiped down all the walls, well, I’d probably die right there on the spot

And that would be a perfect Mother’s Day

Or…………….

Lucy can just wake me up at 5:00 asking if she has to go to school or if she can watch something

Sean can roll over and snore just a bit louder than he was two hours ago

Then, I’ll finally get out of bed at 6:15 to minimize Lucy’s TV time and make us a big breakfast as I typically do on Sundays

After we eat and the kitchen is clean, I’ll herd us upstairs to get cleaned up while making a list in my head of what we need at Target and the grocery store

We’ll be in the car an hour later and when we finally get home 3 hours later, we’ll get everything put away and Sean and Lucy will go outside to play

I’ll strip the beds and collect all the dirty towels and laundry in the house and start the first of at least 5 loads

Then, I’ll make lunches and dinners for the week, get Lucy’s things together for school, go through the mail that’s been sitting on the table for a week and make dinner

After dinner, I’ll pack lunches, fold laundry, read to Lucy while Sean remakes the bed and then whine about tomorrow being Monday while I put the laundry away (that’s me whining not Sean)

Then, Sean and I will settle on the couch for a hour of TV…..until Lucy wakes up crying out and I go snuggle with her as she falls asleep kicking me repeatedly in the gut…..

That would be a pretty good day too…maybe not perfect but close enough…

But, its perfect enough because I get to be a Mum…..

Seriously though, if someone wants to give the ole Corolla a spit shine, inside and out, the keys are in the basket on the bookcase

Maria the Mum