Wednesday, August 19, 2015


Yesterday, I had a meeting with a professional
That is to say he was in a suit and tie

And he went by Joey
Which is so wrong in my head

Joey is my brother's best friend from grade school

Joey is the guy at the end of the bar buying shots for everyone

Joey is the guy you call when you need someone who knows someone who knows someone

Joey is the uncle who teaches your 10 year old son how to penny a door, lets your 5 year old daughter paint his nails, gives your teenage son a Trojan for his wallet and shows up when your teenage daughter is getting picked up for a date looking menacing and making idle threats for no reason

Joey not should be wearing a suit, cuff links and Armani shoes

Joey should not be driving an Audi and have so much responsibility

Nor should he be shorter than me and balding

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