Thursday, July 26, 2012

Anger Management

Today’s Post brought to you by the Letter L, the Number 3 and Mama Kat’s Pretty Much World Famous Writing Workshop

2.) List 10 things that make you angry

To the driver in front of me at the light:
If you are making a left hand turn, please, pull forward so the rest of us can get past you……that’s why there is all that extra space there in the intersection
Just pull forward a little
You don’t have to start your turn that would be dangerous
Just move up a bit so the rest of us can get past you
I know, I agree, it’s a tough intersection and there really should be a left turn arrow but there’s not so please, just pull up a little
I’m trying to help you out here
Plus the guy behind me honking and flailing his arms is really starting to stress me out
Please, just pull forward

If I ask you to do something a certain way, it’s not because I think I’m right and you’re wrong
I don’t think I am smarter than you
I’m not trying to be bossy
I don’t think it’s my way or the highway
I’ve been doing this for 12 years
You haven’t
I do this every day, you don’t
So please, just do it the way I am asking you too
Saves me the aggravation of having to do it over because I really don’t like having to re-do work that’s already been done
It is a waste of time, money and resources

Laws are in place for a certain reason
Not because the government wants to control our every move or monitor what we do
Some laws are meant to keep us safe
Now I know you think pedestrian laws are silly because, well, you think your 150lb body should have right of way over my 2,900lb Corolla but really, they are for your safety and mine
So could you please, please for the love of God, follow the pedestrians’ laws (which by the way does not say pedestrians can do whatever they want)

Same goes for you people on bicycles and motorcycles
Just because you can fit in between the two lanes of traffic does not mean it’s a good idea to do so
If we have to stop at the Stop sign, so do you
Being on a bike does not give you right of way
If you are on the same road I am, yes, the road rules are the same for you….can you please just follow them?

IT people
Some people I know and love are “IT People” but you people, oh how you make me crazy!
You and your shut down and restart and log off versus switch user
You who tells me what I’m telling you happens does not happen because you do not see it on your event log
You, oh lovable IT person, who thinks you are so much smarter than the rest of us because you can read code, write code, decipher code…or program shit or whatever it is you do with all your mumble jumbo dingo lingo
You are still not a bad ass spy like Mitch Rapp or Jason Bourne
Oh lovable social misfit IT persons
I can line up 5 of you and get 5 different answers/solutions to the same question
How about you just make it work?!?!
I don’t care how you do it and I can’t answer why the IT person before you did what he did, just please make it work
And please, don’t tell me the computer I just spent $2700 on less than two years ago is old and out dated………
You’re the one who told me to buy it!!!!

You know what else makes me angry?
What absolutely pushes me even closer to the edge I am already on?
When we, society, talks about stopping to smell the roses
We urge one another to live in the moment
To live each day to the fullest
We try to convince one another and ourselves to slow down, to savor the moment
But we don’t
Instead we rush
We’re impatient
We’re pushy
I walked into a store that shall not be named so as not to signal you and your big red bull’s-eye out and you know what was there?
I was mildly shocked two weeks ago when the back to school supplies were out but really?
You just took away like three months of moments for me
And you stressed me out and I caught myself almost buying stuff so I would not miss out on anything
Can you please just let me finish my summer watermelon before you entice me with Halloween candy?

I like animals
I really do
I like dogs and cats and goats and ok, not snakes
And I get that for some people, pets are an alternative to having children for whatever reason
I get it
I do
But please, listen to me….
You did not birth that puppy dog sitting at your feet
That kitty?
The one who just scratched the hell out of my leg with his claws because I was “sitting in his chair?”
He did not spring forth from your loins
Please, stop calling yourself Mummy and Daddy
And please, do not refer to your human child as their sibling
They will never share clothes
They don’t share the same DNA
And they are not related by blood

I have one child; notice I dropped the “only one”
And just because I have one child, I am not less of a mother, wife or woman than that frazzled lady in the line next to me at the grocery store with 6 kids hanging off her cart, one in the sling on her back and one that appears to be due in about 3 months
I have one child, and guess what?
My child, my one child, makes me….wait for it….
A mother………….
And please, don’t ask me if it is by choice I have one child (something I too have been guilty of but usually when I am having a conversation with another Mum about having an only child) or if there some other reason
Don’t assume I can’t handle or afford more than one child
Don’t assume I can’t medically have more children because guess what?
It’s none of your business
You have no idea how offensive that is
And how much it may hurt
Me or any other mother of a single child
You have no idea what that Mum and Dad have been through
So not, DO NOT diminish my parenthood, their parenthood, because we have “only” one child
Because if I have one child or 11, I will love them
I will still strive to be the best mother and mentor I can be
I am still a Mum if I have one child or 11 children
So stop with your questions and comments about my motherhood and whether or not I deserve it because I “only have” one child

What are we up to? 7…...great, I have 3 more

I don’t care what Church you go to, what God you worship, what holidays you observe – because I too have my own
And guess what?
I have them for me
God is part of my life because I need him to be, I want him to be
I said Merry Christmas to you because I celebrate Christmas which is not about the giving of gifts but about the birth of Jesus
I don’t say it to offend you, I say it to celebrate
So how about you just smile and say, Same to you or Happy Holidays
When my Muslim neighbors celebrate the end of Ramadan, I celebrate with them (those cookies she makes are delish!)
And when my Jewish work colleague celebrates Yom Kippur, I wish him well and tell him to enjoy his resting day
And if you wish me Happy Holidays because that is what you are comfortable saying, I’m okay with that….I appreciate the sentiment – but lighten up about the Merry Christmas will ya?

Just because I am Republican, it does not mean I am stupid
Or that I am close minded
Or that I hate for the sake of hating
It does not mean I hate gays, blacks, or immigrants
It does not mean I carry a gun or think everyone should own guns
Just because I am a Republican, it does not mean I don’t or can’t have some liberal opinions (like I see no problem with wearing white after Labor Day….pretty darn liberal if you ask me)
Just because I am Republican it does not mean I am sexually repressed or worse, and some weirdo closet pervert
Just because I am a Republican does not mean you can’t talk to me about politics or religion or sex
Just because I am Republican and Catholic and you are Democratic and spiritual as opposed to religious (and by that I mean you don’t subscribe to an organized religion because you think people who do can’t think for themselves and are nothing but followers) it does not mean you can’t talk to me about politics and religion
Do you think I am going to try to convert you?
Do you think I am going to tell you you’re wrong?

Because if you do, dig deeper: it’s probably you who will try to tell me I’m wrong

It’s probably you who will try to lure me away from the Church because it is such an awful entity
It is actually you who is more closed minded because you won’t have discussions with me about politics and religion
Instead, you’ll just tell me Republicans are stupid, and rich and white
And that we hate minorities and gays
Then you’ll tell me Catholics are sheep....followers because we can’t think for ourselves
And we hate gay people and don’t have a grasp on social issues
You’ll tell me that Catholics don’t care about sex abuse victims or scandals, that we cover everything up
Hey, look in your own closets because I’m pretty sure you have your fair share of rich folks, white folks, haters and liars as well
And that makes us more alike than I am sure you care to admit
I relish having friends who are different from me
I look forward to talking to people who subscribe to different ideologies and religions than I do
It’s how I learn
And yes, sometimes, someone will change what I think or what side I’m on
And sometimes, you’ll only solidify my resolve to remain true to my conservatism and Catholicism

My sister told me a story about how someone at work was offended when she referred to a ream of paper as colored paper
He was offended by her use of the word colored
I have a friend who when one is talking about certain groups of people, will correct people when they say black instead of African Americans or he’ll want you to say of Latin Descent instead of Latino
That I can’t call all people from India Indian because Indian is offensive
And that if I am referring to a group of men and women, I should not say you guys I should say you folks or all of you people because “you guys” could be offensive to the women…and some men
But I should not say men and women or ladies and gentlemen because there may be someone who is transgender (or was it transsexual) in the group
I wrote a memo listing the holidays the office is closed
I was informed I should not call it Christmas Day but simply write December 25th because not everyone celebrates Christmas
Same was true for Good Friday
My point?
What makes me angry?
We are too overly PC in this country
We are so hypersensitive that we can’t carry on a conversation without finding a reason to be offended
Stop looking for reasons to be offended and I think you’ll realize you are not as offended as you think you are

And for the love of God America, mind your manners!
Say please and thank you
Respect people’s personal space
Stop pushing and shoving on the T and in the stores 
If you receive a gift or you stay at someone’s house or someone helps you with something, write a thank you note
Hold the door open for one another
Stop and let that car out into traffic
And if someone lets you out into that line of traffic, wave and say thank you
Stop having conversations on your cell phone in public
If we’re talking, if I am standing in front of you, pay attention to me! Don’t be “checking in” on Facebook, posting your status or texting someone else
We were out with Lucy the other day, some place where there were other kids with their parents….we were the only parents paying attention to their child
The rest of the parents?
They were on their phones
Two actually shooed their child away while they finished typing something
When you make eye contact, smile, say hello
If someone smiles and says hello to you, smile and say hello does wonders for your soul
Just be nice
Listen to Dalton America
Be nice

And finally, no one, and I mean no one, is entitled to anything except Life, Liberty and the pursuit of Happiness
I don’t care who your parents are
I don’t care what color you are
I don’t care what you’re ethnicity is
I don’t care what your nationality is
I don’t care who your ancestors are
I don’t care what you’re sexual orientation is
I don’t care that you have a bachelor’s degree or a master or a PhD
You want something?
You need something?
You want to be someone?
Work for it
Earn it
Don’t just expect it because of who you are
Earn it
Deserve it
And when you get it,
Appreciate it
Savor it
And never let it go

**And please, do not take anything I've written personally...I'm probably not even talking about you......unless I've actually said some of these things to you about you and then I am talking about you....but I'll have already said it to you so really, you should not be offended
It is people who are extreme in the behaviors I reference that make me crazy
And if you do think I am talking about can't be mad at me for that

Maria the Mum


  1. Wow…I love your post. I have one child too. He's 18 now and through the years I've heard some pretty outrageous comments. The best one is how you really aren't a parent until you have two kids constantly arguing??? Whatever. I also like the religion/ Catholic post….I've dealt with that too. So enjoyed reading :)

  2. Thanks Melva - amazing what people will say to the parents of one child isn't it? Makes me sad, and sometimes still hurts but mostly, it just makes me love her more (if that's even possible!)

  3. I agree that it's just as much of a job being a mother to one as to multiple kids. I've kind of had both experiences. I raised my first child until he was 17 before having 3 more.

    hi from mk's


Note: Only a member of this blog may post a comment.