How You Doin', Singing Bus, Sugar Bugs, Dress Up, 2 Dads, Crib Out, My Noggin

Hey Daddy, how's....
Remember how I told you about Lucy figuring out the whole boys have a penis girls have a vagina thing (Vagina Monologues)? Well, a couple weeks ago, I forget what we were doing...maybe having a meal, getting ready for work, or playing, Lucy looks at her Dad and says

Daddy, how's your penis?


The Ice Cream Truck
We were outside one night playing when the ice cream truck pulled into our circle playing its ice cream truck song and attracting the attention of the neighborhood kids.

What's that Mama?

Not missing a beat, and not wanting  to set a precedent of getting ice cream from the truck that drives through the neighborhood EVERY night, I say

That's a singing truck Lucy! Pretty cool huh?

Sean and Kristen seemed momentarily impressed with my quick thinking....but Lucy looked at me quizzically, then at the truck then back at me...then at the truck. She slowly turned to me....

No it's not Mama

My shoulders sagged as I thought I had been figured out (at this point, the other kids were at the window of the singing truck getting handed ice cream and Popsicles)

Mama, that's not a singing truck, that's a singing bus!

Oh, my mistake Lucy! You're right, it is a bus, not a truck...a singing bus, that was what I meant to say!

Silly Mummy she says and goes back to playing

Now, when we hear the ice cream truck, she shouts out
It's the singing bus! and we rush to see it go by and simply stand and enjoy whatever song the bus happens to be singing


Sugar Bugs 
Lucy was touted as being the best toothbrusher at school...a skill she is not so quick to share at home. However, the recent discovery of "sugar bugs" on her teeth has turned her into a right old soldier.

We cajole her into actually brushing her teeth (not just sucking the toothpaste off the bristles and chewing on the head of the brush) by telling her we see sugar bugs crawling around and dare her to try and catch them!
So she attacks the sugar bugs with great enthusiasm pulling her toothbrush out of her mouth every minute or so and shouting 

I caught one I caught one! as she holds her brush up for us to see. 

Look at the size of that one! we'll exclaim as we all stare at the sugar bug on her toothbrush and congratulate her for such a catch.

We'll let her brush her teeth for a few minutes than I'll ask if I can try to catch a sugar bug....

OK Mama as she hands me her sword (toothbrush) and opens wide....and then giggles and drools as I make a big deal about chasing the lone sugar bug that keeps jumping from the front teeth to the back, from the left to the right from behind her teeth to the front of her teeth....and when I finally catch him and proudly show her my fugitive, she looks at me and says

Good catch Mummy!

Kevin got Lucy in a Dress

A few blogs back (I'm not wearing that ), I shared with you that Lucy hates dresses.

Hates them so much she will not even wear a nightgown (though she will wear just a T Shirt to bed)

Kevin, Lori and Caitlin came down one Sunday after attending a graduation party. Caitlin walked in wearing the prettiest little dress I have ever seen – complete with a bow on the back and a petticoat of tulle underneath. At some point, Cait was changed out of the dress so the girls could play…..somehow, conversation shifted to getting Lucy in a dress (probably because I commented on how cute Caitlin looked and how I wished that now and then, I could get Lucy in such a dress)

Kevin pipes up and say, bet I can get her to put the dress on.

Lori, Sean and I laughed – hard.

Kevin says, I bet I can, seriously, can’t be that hard.

I stop laughing long enough to accept his challenge ($20 bet) and gave him a few guidelines (no screaming, crying, whining or fussing from Lucy, and she had to put the dress on willingly not forced over her head) We even had a time limit which was, I think, 20 minutes

Kevin, who is always calm, mellow, reassuring and kind in his ways, says in his quiet confident voice, I can do it

The girls were playing in the living room and Kevin settled on the edge of the rug watching them with the dress in his hand.

Lucy he says, come here a second.

Lucy, who adores Kevin, Lori and Caiti, stands in front of Kevin.

Can you do me a favor Lucy?

Yeah! Lucy says while rocking back and forth

Can you put this on for me?

Next thing we know, Lucy has her arms raised above her head and is letting Kevin slip the dress down over her head! We stopped laughing

You look beautiful Kevin says to Lucy

She turns on her heel, wearing said dress, and throws herself on the floor giggling and continues playing with Cait…

It took Kevin 3 minutes to get her in the dress….and I still owe him $20.

My Two Dads

Right now, Lucy’s favorite book is a children’ Bible Aunt Marie and Uncle Bill gave her for Easter

We read the WHOLE thing EVERY night.

Last night, as we were reading about Moses and the burning bush, which comes right after the story about Moses being put in the basket, Lucy asks

Mummy, God is Baby Jesus’ Daddy?

Yep, he is Lucy, that’s right

Oh……..She says and thinks for a second

God is Baby Moses’ Daddy too?

Well yes, in a sense he is Lucy. God is everybody’s Daddy

Her eyes grew wide at this

What about Daddy? Is he still MY Daddy?

Well of course Daddy is your Daddy…I was not sure where to go from here but Lucy finished up for me

Oh, so I have 2 Daddies….how many Mummies do I have?

Out damn crib, out!

Back in May, before Uncle Gareth came to visit, I wrote that Lucy started sleeping in her big girl bed

Two weeks after she started sleeping in her bed, I was downstairs getting some laundry when I heard some banging around up in Lucy’s room

Lucy! I yelled up the stairs.

Hi Mama!

Are you OK?

Yeah Mama

What are you doing?

No answer…

Lucy? I dash up the stairs…...

I turn the corner to see Lucy’s crib partially blocking the door and Lucy on the other side grunting as she tries to push it out the door!

What are you doing?

I no need crib anymore Mama! I have my big girl bed! Lucy has a big girl bed! Not a baby bed!

We broke down the crib that night, threw it in the basement and have not looked back….next she’ll probably ask for a car…..

Hit my noggin

We’re walking down the stairs to breakfast Tuesday morning, I was in front of Lucy

I hear this thud and turn to see Lucy rubbing the side of her head and muttering to herself

You okay honey?

Yeah Mama, I just bumped my silly noggin on the wall……..

Lucy’s breakfast on my shirt

Got to work yesterday morning and looked down to discover I was wearing part of Lucy’s breakfast on my shirt…..I look good in chocolate chip pumpkin bread……

Maria, the Mum  

Lists

Either I have the block again or Lucy is just not as funny as I thought....

List People that make you wonder Where are They Now?
Six from Blossom
Rayanne from My So Called Life
Sherman Douglas, one of my favorite basketball players ever
Jake Ryan, really do I need to tell you where he's from?!?
Corky from Life Goes On
Blair from Facts of Life
Some of the people I went to High School and college with
My old boss Alan, what was his last name...it began with a B...he had weird lips but I totally had a crush on him....and he ended up dating a woman we worked with...I was jealous...but I wonder what happened to him.....and this other guy Joe I worked with, I wonder what happened to him
This guy Phil I dated in Illinois - super nice guy...I mean he was such a nice guy that at some point, I stopped thinking of him as a boyfriend and he became more of a companion....and my designated driver as he was not a big drinker and we dated in my mid-20's...and need I say more about my mid-20's? Anyway, I broke up with him because he was way too nice for me and there was no way I was ready to settle down.....but still saw him for like two years - we'd go to weddings together, parties that mutual friends had...I'd see him at Frank and Jenny's....I lost touch with him about a year or so before I moved.....so I wonder what happened to him.....he was so nice....

List Memorable Activities/Events from When You Were a Kid
Going to the beach - Mum and Aunt Marie would load us kids up (7 of us, 3 of them) and we'd head off to the beach for the day...tuna and egg salad sandwiches, chips, sand in everything...it was great. Sometimes, Mum would even pull us out of school saying we had doctor's appointments...
Fishing in the ditch - When John and I were little, we'd tie string to a twig and cast our lines into ditch in front of our house...we never caught anything....
I remember staying at Grammy and Grampy's house quite fondly...especially when right before we went to bed, Grampy would give us a jar to catch fireflies and then he would place a piece of plastic wrap over the jar, secure it with an elastic, punch a couple holes so they could breath and send us off to sleep. Plus, they had a great library in their house and I read tons of books...same books my Mum read as a kid. Grammy's house is where I met Nancy Drew, Trixie Belden, and The Bobbsey Twins.
Christmas Eve - always a favorite. We be lived in Santa until we were like teenagers....but with younger kids in the house, it wasn't that hard. My parents would host an open house on Christmas Eve so there was a steady stream of company. The tree would go up and we would place, if we were lucky, one decoration each on it....and then it was left for Santa to finish...and we had a fence around our tree....and then we'd try to fall asleep but just end up giggling and sneaking up and down the stairs to spy on the adults and look for Santa....
I remember going to this little pizza place for dinner - and there was this guy who used to sit on a stool with his guitar and sing folk songs...and Puff the Magic Dragon. That is, to this day, still one of my favorite songs and stories
Summer softball and baseball games...both in our yard and with the ORA

Maria, the Mum

No Daddy, I.....

Conversation I just overheard between Sean and Lucy:
Sean: Lucy, did you just toot?
Lucy: No Daddy, I fart!


- Posted using BlogPress from my iPad

As Good as It Gets

Tuesday, I picked Lucy up from day care and we headed home as we normally do with little or no fanfare.
When we arrived home, Lucy, in her blue and white polka dotted coat and her two pig tails, asked if she could play with some of the neighborhood kids.

Sure, I say, we're home early....and in my head I knew dinner was already made, just had to be warmed up so we had plenty of time

We hopped out of the car and took a look around to see who was out and realized, we were the only ones outside.....which given the number of kids here is very unusually. even Pat and Kristen were not around

We wandered over to the big sitting rock and Lucy kept scanning the circle to see if anyone was out.
She looked so......well, her blond hair, which keep getting blonder, was in two little pig tails that had a slight curl in each of them...her hair was framing her face perfectly and for the first time, I saw her as a little girl...not a baby, not a little monkey, not an imp, but a little girl with thoughts, feelings and, I'm praying, hopes and dreams running through her little being.

Her skin, she has gorgeous skin on her face...its not translucent but sometimes, because its so fair, it seems to be almost shimmering....and her eyes! She had these gorgeous blue eyes in which she can express whatever she is thinking or feeling sometimes better than she can in words......her eyes will dance and flicker when she is amused, they twinkle and smile right before she does something she is not supposed to and cloud over just before she release the Kraken.

Lucy held onto my hand, as she paced in a little a circle looking for someone to play with....every few seconds, I would squeeze her hand and she would squeeze mine back and look me directly in the eye giving me a smile that tugged at my heart strings....

She asked to climb up on the rock, maybe to get a better view- still no one to play with
Where all the kids Mama?
I don't know honey, maybe eating dinner...?
Oh, OK Mama. Lucy wait? And with that, she started to sing a song to herself and sort of walked back and forth across the surface of the rock waiting for someone, anyone, to come out and play.

Lucy kept singing and my heart slowly but surely started to ache as a lump worked it's way into my throat and my eyes filled with tears.....

I'm not sure why I was so upset, Lucy could have cared less. She seemed pretty content just singing to herself and watching the world, and the squirrels go by

But I felt awful - its that feeling I imagine a parent gets when their child comes home and says he was picked last in gym class for the team....or when she comes home and says Susie invited everyone to her birthday party except me....I dread those days because I'm too sensitive (and will cry) and then I get angry (and will want to hunt the kid who hurt my kid down and give him or her a wedgie) I so badly wanted to go knock on a door and make someone come out and play with her....

And then I felt badly that we did not live near any of her friends from school that could come play with her.....and then i felt worse that she does not have a sister or brother who could be there to play with her......then in my head I jumped to 5/6 years from now and she was still standing on the rock looking for someone to play with........and then out of no where, this awful thought of Lucy not  being in my world worked itself into my head and next thing I know, i am sobbing....tears are falling down my face and I have no control over the,m - and the lump in my throat is so big I can hardly swallow....even now, as I recall and write this, the lump and tears are back - for no reason, just those fleeting thoughts one has as a Mum...wondering if what you are doing is right, if what you've given your child is enough...hoping this is as good as it gets and nothing changes....because this is good enough for me.....I have what I deserve, I don't need more.....just keep us safe, keep us healthy, keep us happy and I won't ask for more....

And Lucy....Lucy is still holding my hand walking back and forth on the rock singing Ba Ba Black Sheep....

Hi Mama! she says with a grin
Hi Lucy I somehow eek out...
Mama sad?
No Lucy, Mama's not sad....
Oh, Mama cry?
Ohh, maybe just a little bit Lucy....I can't lie to her....
Why Mama?

I had no answer for her, how do I explain to my 2 year old what my heart is so upset about....? Si I just sort of shrug and hope she'll move on.....

Mama sad 'cuz no one can play?
I nodded
Oh, but Mama...
Yes baby...?
Lucy's face broke out into a grin and she excitedly pointed over my shoulder....

Mama, fire hydrant! And with that, Lucy jumped down off the rock, ran over to Albert the fire hydrant, gave him a pat and threw me a smile over her shoulder....

Maria the Mum

10 Places, 10 Books

10 Fictional Places I Wish Existed

1. Narnia
2. Terabithia
3. Vulgaria (after the Baron Bomburst is overthrown of course)
4. Neverland
5. Hogsmeade
6. Hogwarts
7. Willie Wonka's Chocolate Factory
8. Mystery, Alaska, Twin Peaks
9. Tara Plantation
10. Utopia or The Fountain of Youth

10 Books I've Never Read and have No Desire to Read (nor will I allow any one to make me feel less intelligent because "you haven't read that?!?" is how they react)

1. Moby Dick
2. War and Peace
3. Jane Eyre - I tried, I really did
4. Don Quixote - if I did read it, I don't remember doing so
5. Profiles in Courage - I actually try to avoid books by politicians....
6. The Sound and the Fury
7. Beloved
8. Lord of the Rings or The Hobbit - again, I tried, I really tried
9. The last 4 books of the Chronicles of Narnia (chronological order not publication order)
10. The Twilight Books and The Girl who got a tattoo, played with fire, and kicked a hornet's nest Books 

Maria, the Mum

What that? Where Uncle Gareth?

Fire Hydrant
One of my favorite things about Lucy is how inquisitive she is - Why, What and Who are frequent questions in our house. And when she learns something new, be it a concept, a word, or meets a new friend, she embraces said new learned item/idea or person with great enthusiasm and love

So when, driving down the street one day she pointed out the window and asked
What that Daddy?
A fire hydrant Sean replied
Oh, fire hydrant, Lucy repeated with a giggle
We had no idea that would be the beginning of her love...of fire hydrants

Now, when we get in the car or take a walk, Lucy points out EVERY fire hydrant we pass. And if we're walking, we stop and say hello to EVERY fire hydrant...we even name them....I'm not even kidding you

There is a fire hydrant in from of our house, his name is Albert. Every morning she runs out the door and yells
Good Morning fire hydrant!

She may run over and give him a couple pats or she may just stand across the way from him and wave
Then, when its time to get in the car and head to school, she waves and yells with great love,
Buh Bye fire hydrant! Have a good day! See you this afternoon!

When we arrive home, before we've even pulled up to the house, she'll tell me she wants to see the fire hydrant. We hop out of the car and she runs right over to say hello
Hi yo fire hydrant! Lucy home!
And then she just stands next to him and giggles

She forgets his name so she'll ask
What his name Mummy?
Albert I say
Oh....Albert...Hi Yo Albert! Hi Yo fire hydrant.....!!!

I miss the days when something like a fire hydrant fascinated and made me so happy......and I'm glad Lucy has those days....

Where Uncle Gareth?
Sean keeps asking me if I'll blog about Gareth's visit....
Probably not, I replied. It was like our England trip; there was so much we did and saw that I can't seem to focus enough to get it down...but I'll share stories here and there about it...and maybe someday, I'll be able to blog completely about both (the England trip and Gareth's visit) but for now, anecdotes here and there will do

While Gareth was here, Lucy became quite attached to him - the poor guy could not be out of the room for more than 3 minutes without Lucy looking around and asking
Where Uncle Gareth? Where Uncle Gareth?
And if we were not watching, she'd scoot up over the stairs and go looking for him! But to Gareth's credit, he was quite patient with her and I dare say may have relished the attention.

Lucy would stand outside his door every night before her bath and call in here sing songy voice
Uncle Gareth!!!! Uncle Gareth!!
And he would say Hi Lucy, come on in
And she sometimes would go in and bug him for a few minutes but mostly, she just wanted him to look over at her so she could giggle and run away

By the third or fourth night, our bed time routine consisted of me getting her ready for her bath, Daddy and Uncle Gareth bathing her, me dressing her for bed, then Lucy, Uncle Gareth and Daddy piling onto Uncle Gareth's bed to watch an episode of Scooby Doo. I would hear the three of them laughing....then I would hear Sean or Gareth do a Scooby or Shaggy impression...then I would hear Lucy do a Scooby or Shaggy impression!

Gareth left on a Sunday, he headed to the airport at 4:30ish. When I took Lucy up for her bath, her first question was
Where Uncle Gareth? and she then ran to his door to find an empty room.
Honey Uncle Gareth had to go home...
Why? He was home....at Lucy's house
No honey, he had to go home to his house...he went home to see his Mummy...his Mummy missed him just like I miss you when you are at school
Oh, Uncle Gareth went to see his Mummy?
Yes honey
Oh.....Lucy still watch Scooby Doo?
Yes baby! Uncle Gareth left Scooby Doo for you!
OK Mummy...

This went on for like four or five nights - she'd look for him as soon as we got home and then again at bath time. The first couple nights it made me sad, she just missed him! By the fourth night, I figured she'd get tired of looking for him - until the breakdown

On this particular night, she ran up over the stairs ahead of me calling for Uncle Gareth

Lucy, Uncle Gareth isn't here honey, he went home to see his Mummy...
Why Mama?
Well, he missed his Mummy and his Mummy missed him......by now, we're in Uncle Gareth's room and Lucy is leaning against the bed
But Mama...I want Uncle Gareth! I miss Uncle Gareth!

And with that, she put her head in her arms and started crying......there are times as a parent that your child's tears will reduce you to tears, this was one of those times

Lucy cried and cried and cried....and she would pick her little head up and through tears and snot plead for Uncle Gareth - and all I could do was sit on the floor next to her and rub her back. This went on for almost ten minutes

Her crying was reduced to sniffling and she climbed in my lap and buried hear head in my chest. We sat quietly for five minutes or so....a couple heaves and sighs escaped her little body and she asked
Mama, Uncle Gareth come see Lucy again?
Yes honey, he'll come back and see Lucy again, or maybe we can go visit...
Oh, OK Mama.....Mama?
Yes Lucy
Uncle Gareth with his Mummy?
Yes baby, he's with his Mummy
Oh.....Mama...I miss Uncle Gareth
I know honey, Mummy does too

Lucy started to cry again and called out his name a couple times. I hugged her tighter and soothed her as best I could...she calmed down and took a couple deep breaths....

Mama?
Yes Lucy
We still watch Scooby Doo?
Of course we can honey, we'll take a bath and watch Scooby Doo just like you did with Uncle Gareth...
Lucy hopped up and proclaimed, in her best Scooby voice....
SCOOBY DOOBY DOOOOOO!!!!

Maria, the Mum

Hurt Locker

Sean observed this morning, quite brilliantly, that being a parent is like being a member of the Bomb Squad....you never know when your child is going to blow or what the trigger will be or which wire to cut to disarm them

Lucy has been in the state of a tantrum since last night at 5:30.

I arrived at Day Care at 5:20, the kids were outside playing. So I nipped into her class room, grabbed her bag and the art work in her little mailbox - a duck and two ladybugs. I found Lucy outside making a sand cake and singing Happy Birthday (to Lucy) and, as she always does, she invited me over for a piece of sand cake. By all accounts, Lucy had a great day (made even more great by the fact that Kylie was back from vacation) though she did not really care for the chicken she had for lunch.

I collected Lucy and we headed out to the car. As we were walking down the hall, she noticed the duck in her bag and wanted to hold it. Somehow, the duck's beak fell off along with a couple feathers - Lucy's bottom lip started to quiver and she did that thing with her eyes, where they sort of start to scrunch up....

Honey, its okay, Mummy will fix it, I promise.....I then distracted her with a little snack pack of M&M's (stashed in my bag for just such a potential crises)
Drive home was uneventful as Lucy was chomping her MMs as she calls them

We arrived home and she asks if we can hang her duck and ladybugs on the wall

Of course we can baby, you show Mummy where we should hang them and we'll do it right now
Yeah Mummy, for Daddy?
Yep, we'll hang them up before Daddy gets home and surprise him
OK Mummy

I get the tape, Lucy climbs up on the chair and as I'm putting tape on the duck (after I repaired his beak) and lady bugs, Lucy pointed to the wall next to the clock and said Ducky there.
Then she pointed to the spot next to the light switch and said Ladybugs there Mummy.
OK I agree....

Next thing I know, she starts crying, screaming and throws herself off the chair (I may be chubby but I still have great reflexes)...I caught her on the way down

Lucy is wailing and muttering something completely unintelligible...she may or may not have been putting a curse on me.

Her crying and yelling get louder and no matter how hard I try to calm her down, I can't. So I move the stool, push in the chairs, pick up the broom and leave her to work it out.

I swept, emptied our lunch bags, fed the fish, checked the calendar for what cards need to be mailed next and waited for the crying and screaming to subside. At one point, there was a break and I crouched down to her level and asked her if she wanted a snuggle

Go AWAY Mummy!! as she pushed with her hands and feet

I stood up and walked away which prompted an even louder wail. She jumped up, ran into the living room and threw herself onto the floor...and just kept crying

Sean walked in the door about 35 minutes after this started - helluva thing to walk into.
What happened he asked
No idea I replied, no idea

She carried on for another 10 minutes or so before she finally started to calm down....and announced she was hungry

So I put out a plate and tried to get her to her chair. But she spotted a loaf of bread and asked for some....I pulled the bread out and made the mistake of getting a knife to cut the stale end off before handing it to her....she started to cry...I pleaded with her to just give me a second, I was trying to get the yucky part off....Sean reassured her Mummy was fixing it for Lucy....but she cried.

I handed her the chunk of bread, crying ceased and then tried to guide her to her chair......but quickly realized I was in violation of whatever silent peace treaty had just been reached as her eyes started to cloud over and the vein on her forehead began to throb.....so I suggested that we sit on the front porch and have dinner

So Lucy, looking like a prisoner as she clutched her bread, and I (with her plate and milk in hand) headed to the front porch to enjoy the evening air.

She was fine for ten minutes - when all of a sudden, she took a big bite of bread, leaned over so she was in my face, opened her mouth and spit said bread in my face.......

I did not lose my cool. I simply stood up, told Lucy that was not OK, took the bread away and marched her into the house. She threw herself on the living room floor and cried.

By the time we make it up to the tub, it is 7:30....by this time, we are usually dressed for bed.
I wrestled her through her bath, got her dressed (minimal wrestling) and at 9:15 , I finally descend downstairs to have dinner with Sean.

She awoke this morning with no apparent after effects of last night's tantrum. Seemed like the day was off to a good start, we were even a few minutes ahead of schedule so we played monster hide and seek for a few minutes.....and then, next thing we know...........Lucy explodes into a temper tantrum.......

25 minutes of crying, writhing around on the floor, kicking, screaming, slamming the door, telling me to go away

Know what made her stop? Not promises of seeing Rosie or Caiti, not promises of hearing the Beatles or playing with the puppies when we got home....not even the prospect of wearing new shoes stopped her tantrum....know what made her stop? The pickle....

Somehow, I got her up on the changing table, somehow, I got her to stop kicking me and I asked her to give me five (as an attempt to divert her attempts to hit me)...
Give me five...other side....cut the pickle (you put the tips of your pointer fingers together and the person is supped to chop them apart)....then you say tickle tickle and tickle the person.....that was what made her stop.

Know how long it took me to get her diaper changed, get her dressed, wash her face, brush her hair and get her shoes on...??

About 4 minutes

As we were walking to the car, Lucy asked me if I would go in Lucy's car.
Oh honey, Mummy has to go to work but this weekend, Mummy will ride in Lucy's car with her...(by now, I have her in the car seat and I'm buckling her in)
Please Mummy....? voice wavering and cracking just a bit. Please come in Lucy's car...
Sean wisely hops in the car and says
Hey Lucy, want to hear some Yo Gabba Gabba music?
Ok Daddy...sniff sniff...Please Mummy in Lucy's car

Music starts.....

Daddy says Hey Lucy, it's Party Time in your Tummy!!!!! So yummy!!!!!

Please Mummy, come in Lucy's car......

Sean turns the music up and I do what any mother would do in this situation......I start dancing.....like a lunatic....

And now Lucy is dancing in her seat (and yes, laughing at me).....

Song ends, we're all smiles....and leaving almost 20 minutes late....

Yep, being a parent is like being on the bomb squad......

Maria, the Mum